Kris Aquino says it is only now that she realizes her mom is really gone

"Iniisip ko kung ano ang magiging life ngayon. Kasi you have to be strong for so long because she needed you to be strong. Pero pag mawawala na siya, ngayon talagang... Ngayon mo napi-feel na wala na siya. I just have to share that because that's how much it means for us to be loved," says Kris Aquino about her mother, former President Corazon Aquino (inset).


Matapos ang mahaba at detalyadong salaysay ni Kris Aquino sa The Buzz last Sunday, August 2, tungkol sa huling buwan ng kanyang inang si dating Pangulong Corazon Aquino bago ito pumanaw noong August 1, sumunod namang ibinihagi ni Kris sa kanyang co-host na si Boy Abunda kung anong klaseng ina si Tita Cory. Inilahad ni Kris ang mga masasaya at malulungkot na sandali noong kapiling ang kanyang ina.

"I want to tell everybody what kind of mom my mom was," umpisa ni Kris. "Every premiere ng show [ko], there was a text immediately after to say congratulations and how good I was. 'Pag napi-feel niya na inaapi ako, sasabihin niya, 'Grabe naman sila!' Parang parati niyang pinaparamdam na kakampi ko siya. And she always made me feel how proud she was of me.

"She was there for us, Boy. She would listen. 'Pag nagsusumbong ako, she would always point out the other side. Let me say this also na there was not a premiere night that she didn't attend. Ang pamahiin niya, 'pag nag-a-attend daw siya ng premiere night, blockbuster yung movie ko! She was that type of mom," paglalarawan ng TV host-actress.

NO POLITICS FOR NOW. Marami raw ang nagtatanong noon kay Mrs. Aquino kung kailan niya patatakbuhin sa pulitika si Kris. At ibinahagi ni Kris ang kadalasang isinasagot ng kanyang ina sa ganitong tanong.

"I want to share this with everybody na in the event later on that it's [politics] my calling. People would always ask her, 'Kailan mo patatakbuhin si Kris? Di ba, puwede na siyang mag-vice president?' Ang sabi ng mom, 'Hindi.' Underage daw. And mom said, 'Her lifestyle cannot afford it. 'Pag kaya na ni Kris maging simple, doon ko siya papayagang magpulitika.'

"So, pray natin na maging simple ako!" natatawang sabi ni Kris. "Kung maging simple ako, puwede na ako. Pero ayokong bigyan ng kahihiyan ang mom. So, mahaba pa po bago ako maging simple. You know, mom just knew us so well."

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SENSE OF HUMOR. Ikinuwento ni Kris ang sense of humor ng kanyang ina.

"And I was telling her, kasi I was making kuwento about that Willie [Revillame] and I might have a sitcom. Ang sabi niya, 'Baka ma-link kayo sa isa't isa?' Sabi ko, 'Mom naman!' She had the sense of humor and I want to get that across.

"Sabi ko, 'Di ba, Mom, pag kami ni Willie ang nagsama sa show, super hit?' And she said, 'Konting humility, please.' Yun po, Mom would lift us up. Ili-lift ka but she'd always try to keep it real," nakangiting sabi ni Kris.

Nagpapasalamat nga si Kris dahil pinahintulutan ng Diyos na makapiling ng kanilang pamilya ang kanilang ina ng ilang panahon. Hindi gaya ng nangyari sa kanyang amang si dating Senator Ninoy Aquino na bigla na lang namatay pagkatapos itong ma-assassinate noong August 21, 1983.

"You know, Boy, Dad was taken from us, ganung kabilis," sabi ni Kris. "Siguro in God's wisdom, He gave us one year and six months to be prepared for Mom to go. It wasn't na parang biglang na-shock na lang kami.

"Kay Dad, I was never able to tell him how much I love him except in an interview. Pero sa Mom, lahat kami nabigyan ng chance. And now, looking back, nobody wishes cancer on anybody. Nobody wishes that pain. But ang bait ni God sa pamilya namin, kasi He gave us the chance to make Mom feel we love her. And He gave Mom the chance to say 'thank you.' Alam mo, Boy, every time, she never forgets to say thank you."

VALUING HER CHILDREN. Inalala rin ni Kris kung gaano pinahahalagahan ni Tita Cory ang bagay na galing sa kanyang mga anak. Naging emosyonal nga si Kris sa paglalahad nito.

"I forgot to share this with everybody... There was a watch that Pinky [Kris's sister] was asking, 'Ba't ba ayaw hubarin ng mom 'yang relong 'yan? Ano bang significance ng relo?' Na kahit nandun sa ICU, immediately after each operation, hinihingi niya [Mrs. Aquino].

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"That was the first expensive gift I was able to give her with my earnings. And the time she died, suot niya yung relong yun. Ganun niya ipinaparamdam how much she values us and how proud she was of us," tumutulo ang luhang salaysay ni Kris.

Patuloy niya, "And you know, every time I would give her anything, sasabihin niya, 'Tama na. Mag-save ka na lang.' And I want to say thank you to God kasi I was able to spoil mom.

"I kept the watch. I asked for it, I said, 'Akin na ito. Itatago ko ito.' And I want to say thank you talaga kasi lahat ito nagkaroon ng saysay noong ako yung kumuha ng caregiver para sa mom. She kept saying, 'Magkano ba ang suweldo? Ako na ang magpapasuweldo.' I said, 'Mom, ano ba? That's the least I could do.'

"Nung nakabili ako ng kama para kumportable siya, she said, 'Too much na ito.' Boy, you know lahat ng blanket, lahat ng unan na ginamit niya sa ospital, those were all mine, including the strawberry short-cake blanket. Nung nanganak ako, that was my blanket. So, I felt nabuhay ako after that. I felt it was lucky. So, bawat operation I brought that blanket. And that was the blanket when she passed away.

"Sabi ko, natakot ako talaga kasi nalabhan yung blanket. Binalik tapos nung pinatong sa kanya, sabi ko, 'Oh, my God. Eto na!' And that entire day, July 31, ang bilis-bilis ng puso ko, tumaas yung BP [blood pressure] ko kasi napi-feel ko. And I was right, that was the last blanket there. And you know, those were memories that will forever be with you," umiiyak na sabi ni Kris.

LIFE WITHOUT MOM. Hindi rin daw maisip ni Kris kung paano na ang buhay nila ngayong wala na ang mahal nilang ina.

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"Mom was always there for us. Now, Boy, ngayon ko naiisip talaga what's it's gonna be like 'pag may bagong show tapos walang magte-text ng 'congrats' and 'good luck.' Nung time na may problema ang marriage ko, Mom prayed additional rosary. Pag nagtsa-championship si James [Yap, asawa ni Kris], nagdadagdag siya ng rosary.

"Iniisip ko, Boy, kung ano ang magiging life ngayon. Kasi you have to be strong for so long because she needed you to be strong. Pero pag mawawala na siya, ngayon talagang... Ngayon mo napi-feel na wala na siya. I just have to share that because that's how much it means for us to be loved," tuluy-tuloy na pag-iyak ni Kris habang nagsasalita.

THANKFUL TO EVERYBODY. Sa huli, isa-isang pinasalamatan ni Kris ang mga taong sumuporta sa kanilang pamilya at nagparamdam ng pagmamahal sa kanilang ina.

"May I take this opportunity...kasi her doctors are really good to us. Si Dr. Alex Ayco, in particular, was her doctor, was my lola's doctor and was Pinky's classmate. He's family. All those nights that I was alone, or any of my other siblings, he took it upon himself, nandun siya sa ospital with us. Si Dr. Francis [Lopez] and everybody else. But most of all her nurses, they came from the surgical ICU unit.

"My mom brought us up well. I'd like to believe that. Before she passed away, lahat kami we wrote them thank you cards. And mom said, 'Make sure na may iiwan kayo na laman nung mga card na yun to them.' Because she said, talaga namang inalagaan siya. And I want to say thank you to them.

"I want to say thank you sa lahat ng tao na send us food, Boy. Walang patid... I want to say also thank you to Bishop Soc Villegas and Father Arevalo. Sila yung sandalan namin. Sila yung nagpalapit sa amin lalo pa sa Diyos. I want to say thank you to you [Boy]. You've been my strength."

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At tuluy-tuloy pa ang pagpapasalamat ni Kris.

"Gusto ko pong magpasalamat sa inyong lahat. I promised mom, I would do it, that I would say thank you to all of you. Gusto ko na on behalf of my family, thank you for making my mom your mother. Thank you for the glory of making her the first [woman] Philippine president. Thank you for electing Noy [Sen. Noynoy Aquino, Kris's brother] to the Senate, for giving me the career I have. Thank you for crying with us. Thank you for celebrating mom's life with us.

"Nais ko pong magpasalamat sa lahat ng pumipila. Sa lahat ng ordinaryong tao na pinaparamdam sa mom na mahal nila siya. At nagpapasalamat sila sa naibigay ng mom sa ating bansa. Siguro po, ang dapat nating maalala lahat, ibinuwis ng tatay ko ang buhay niya para magkaroon tayo ng demokrasya. From the time my dad died, all the way until her [Cory's] death, trinabaho ng mom ko na manatili ang demokrasya sa ating bayan.

"I hope that we all do our share to protect that democracy. I hope na lahat tayo will step up, us Filipinos, na gagampanan po natin ang lahat ng magagawa natin to be worthy of our country. I can only promise mom, that apart from the family, I'll try my best to continue to be her voice.

"Nagpapasalamat po ako sa inyong lahat na pinakinggan n'yo ako, na nakikiramay kayo sa amin. Na niyayakap n'yo kami at pinaparamdam sa amin na hindi talaga kami nag-iisa. I want to say thank you from the bottom of my heart, Philippines.

"I hope that you will continue to not just pray for mom's soul, pero ipagdasal po natin ang isa't isa. Ipagdasal po natin ang ating bayan. All of these happened to show us that we can pray together. I think na mom was so humble, na she would want na apart from praying for her, talagang yung Pilipinas ang ipagdasal natin at magsumikap tayo. And thank you, I'm smiling again because I could see the line continue to move, Boy. Parang niyayakap ka, kaya maraming salamat."

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Nagpasalamat din si Kirs sa kaibigang si Lorna Tolentino dahil marami siyang naunawaan at natutunan mula sa experience ni Lorna sa pinagdaanan ng asawa nitong si Rudy Fernandez na namatay rin sa (periampullary) cancer.

"I forgot to make mention na to Ate LT, I called her up and I asked her so many things. And she never failed to answer because halos lahat ng napagdaanan niya, ni Kuya Rudy until the end, yun ang napagdaanan ng mom. Kaya thank you sa kanya for the patience in explaining everything to me," saad ni Kris.

Sa huli, sinabi ni Kris na kinakaya niyang tanggapin ang lahat ng ito dahil nakita niya kung gaano nag-suffer ang kanyang ina sa sakit.

"You know, when people ask me, 'Paano mo kinakaya ngayon?' I just have to say this, I saw mom suffer. Nakita ko yung extent nung pain, kaya natanggap ko that she would die because it would mean that she could have life in heaven and no more pain. And I just like to say again maraming, maraming salamat po sa inyong lahat. Thank you na minahal n'yo kami at minahal n'yo ang mom at minahal n'yo ang dad."

Ihahatid na sa kanyang huling hantungan si dating Pangulong Cory Aquino bukas, August 5, sa Manila Memorial Park, sa tabi ng puntod ng kanyang asawang si dating Senator Ninoy Aquino.


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