Victim blaming o tamang paalala?
Ito ang pinagdebatehan nina Bela Padilla at Alex Gonzaga tungkol sa kontrobersiyal na catfishing, kung saan sangkot diumano ang multimedia artist na si Sam Morales.
Ang catfishing ay ang aktong pamemeke ng internet persona o pagiging poser upang manloko at magmanipula ng tao.
Napukaw ang atensiyon nina Bela at Alex sa paglantad ng tatlong transgender women—Jzan Vern Tero, Josh dela Rosa, at Ish Coldura—sa umano'y panloloko sa kanila ni Sam.
Hiwa-hiwalay ang kanilang kuwento kung paano sila umibig sa isang makisig na lalaking nakilala at nakaka-chat nila sa Tinder, Viber, at Facebook.
Pero sa huli natuklasan ng tatlong transwomen na ang tunay daw na katauhan ng kanilang nakarelasyon ay si Sam Morales.
Sa Instagram bio ni Sam, tinukoy niya ang sarili bilang isang "filmmaker" na ang trabaho ay may kinalaman sa modelling at advertising.
Sina Catriona Gray, Elisse Joson, at Andrea Brillantes ang ilan sa mga artistang nakatrabaho niya umano para sa video shoots ng fashion at beauty brands.
alex-bela exchange
Unang nag-react sa catfishing issue si Alex Gonzaga, 32.
Binalaan ng TV host-actress-YouTuber ang kanyang Twitter followers na maging vigilant pagdating sa mga manloloko o posers sa internet.
"To anyone reading this.. basta ang ka-chat or katext mo di nakipagkita within a month or Video call man lang na sabay kayo dalawa pareho nakikita at naguusap sa screen.. it’s fraud."
Kinontra ni Bela Padilla ang umano'y pagdiin ni Alex sa pagkakamali ng sinumang mabibiktima ng catfishing.
Hindi raw masisisi ang mga nabibitag nang dahil sa pag-ibig.
Ayon sa 28-year-old actress, "This isn’t always the case, Alex.
"The victims of these situations are kept in a bubble, so perfect, that they wouldn’t want to leave.
"One month will feel like a day when they condition you to think that you’re in love and loved."
Sinagot ni Alex ang argumento ni Bela.
Simpleng paalala at hindi paninisi sa biktima ang pinanggagalingan daw niya.
Paliwanag ni Alex, "Hi Bela, i know and understand. I know people who are victims as well.
"That’s why im reminding everyone if simula palang ganun na, it’s shady and fishy na.
"I helped one case to realize that he’s being catfished and thankfully he stopped it.
"Just trying to help and remind."
Sabi naman ni Bela kalakip ang hug emoji, "Perfect."
Para malinaw ay sumagot ulit si Alex.
"We are always here to look after each other especially sa mga nakakabata sa atin," tweet ng YouTuber.
Sa puntong ito nabanggit ni Bela ang kuwento ni Jzan, na walong buwang pinaikot diumano ni Sam.
Ani Bela, "And that’s precisely why I felt the need to reply to your tweet.
"Jzan was so brave to speak up. I don’t want her or anybody else who went through this to think it was their fault."
Saka kinuwestiyon ni Bela ang nabanggit ni Alex na "one month" na palugit para malaman kung peke ang nakaka-chat online.
"I mean, what factual study declared one month? But nevertheless, thank you for the warning"
JZAN VERN'S STORY
Si Jzan Vern Tero ang unang nagsapubliko ng umano'y catfishing modus operandi ni Sam Morales.
Sa salaysay ni Jzan sa kanyang mahabang Twitter thread, nakipagkita siya sa inaakala niyang nobyong nagngangalang "Bill Iver Reyes."
Una pa lang ay nakaramdam na raw siya ng hinala na poser ito.
Pero napaniwala raw si Jzan na sinsero ang lalaki dahil kahit papaano ay may ilang pagkakataong nakakausap niya ito sa telepono o sa video call.
Dalawang beses ding nagkita sa personal sina Jzan at Bill.
Sa ikalawang okasyon ay may nangyaring pang sekswal umano sa couple.
Noon din nagkumpisal si Bill na namanipula lang siya ni Sam para magkunwaring karelasyon ni Jzan, lalo na't ang hanapbuhay daw niya ay nakasalalay kay Sam.
Ani Bill, ang totoong kausap ni Jzan sa loob ng kanilang eight-month romance ay si Sam.
BELA ARGUES WITH NETIZENS
May ilang netizens ang nag-tweet kay Bela na mismong si Jzan ay aminadong naging "marupok" ito.
Makikita sa tweets ni Jzan na ilang beses niyang pinalampas ang red flags sa relasyon nila ni Bill sa ngalan ng pag-ibig.
Sabi ng isang netizen: "But even Jzan admitted that she had her fault, Ms. Bela.
"Naging marupok siya, that was her exact term she used. Aren’t we supposed to take a look at that side as well?!
"Sam & Bilko deserve the hate but I think we need to learn as well from Jzan’s mistake."
Sagot ni Bela: "Being manipulated by a narcissist makes you blame yourself for everything.
"Jzan may have blamed herself but we shouldn’t downplay what she went through as only being 'marupok' and yes, we must learn from what she went through."
Hiwalay na tweet ni Bela sa isa pang netizen, "I’m sorry but marupok is different from catfished.
"This isn’t a simple love story. There is manipulation involved."
May netizen din ang nagsabing choice ito ni Jzan kaya ilang buwan ding tumagal ang relasyon niya kay Bill.
Rason ng netizen, "No, she should have been smarter. Basic po un. Not to blame the victim though."
"You just did," ani Bela sa umano'y victim-shaming ng netizen kay Jzan.
Idiniin ni Bela na mali ang pang-aabusong ginawa ni Sam kay Jzan.
Patuloy ng aktres, "Jzan may be downplaying her pain and joked about being 'marupok' in one of her tweets, but let’s get this straight, whether she was marupok or not, she didn’t deserve to be manipulated.
"Jzan wasnt being dumb. Stop thinking she shouldve been smarter.
"This isnt a basic love story."
ALEX EXPLAINS SHE IS NOT "VICTIM BLAMING"
Sa panig ni Alex, may ilang netizens din siyang pinaliwanagan tungkol sa payo niyang maging mas maingat laban sa catfishing.
Pang-uusig ng isang netizen, "Is this victim blaming? P*ta, isa ka pang dds with your sister. Mga gunggong!"
Maayos na depensa ni Alex, "Nope, it’s a reminder so no one will be a victim again.
"Nobody deserves to be manipulated. Ok? Wag ka nega."
Isa pang netizen ang nag-point out kay Alex na, tulad ng sinabi ni Bela, hindi dapat basta isisi sa tao sakaling mabitag ito ng catfishing.
Sabi nito: "Kaya nga unang line is THIS ISN'T ALWAYS THE CASE.
"Instead [of] reminding, you are blaming the victim for being victimized.
"Anong mahirap intindihin don?"
Inulit ni Alex na hindi victim-shaming ang kanyang intensiyon, kundi tamang paalala na maging maingat sa internet predators.
Tweet ni Alex, "I know that’s why it’s a reminder if ever you’ll be in a situation like this at least kahit paano may alam ka na."
May isang pang netizen ang nagpatutsada, "kasalanan naman pala ni Jzan eh, ganun pala kasimple. t*ng*na talaga @mscathygonzaga."
Balik-sagot ni Alex, hindi niya sinisisi si Jzan sa naging karanasan nito.
"Hindi nya kasalanan pero siguro kaya niya napost is to expose at wala na susunod na biktima. So let’s learn from their stories."
Giit pa ni Alex, "Please don’t misinterpret my warning to my followers to shade people experiencing this ‘coz this is a modus where people invest emotions and sometimes hard earned money.
"May ibang kaso ako alam may malaking pera na involved. Let’s always be vigilant that this is happening."
ALEX, bela ON NETIZENS PITTING THEM AGAINST EACH OTHER
May ibang netizens ang nakapansin sa debate nina Bela at Alex sa catfishing issue.
Isang netizen pa ang nagpa-poll kung sino raw ang dapat kampihan kina Bela at Alex.
Tweet ng netizen: "San tayo?
"Advocacy : Alex - sigurista para ind maloko. Bela - susugal maramdaman lang ang love.
"Vote wisely."
Kinontra naman ni Alex ang opinyon ng netizen na tila segurista siya sa pag-ibig.
Pag-amin ng Kapamilya star, "Darling i was fooled and betrayed so many times.
"I just needed to learn from it and hopefully let other people learn from my mistakes too.
"Hence, #DearAlexBooks."
Sa hiwalay na Twitter thread ni Bela, sinagot niya ang netizens na nagsabing mukhang mag-aaway pa sina Bela at Alex dahil sa catfishing issue.
"Not at all. I love Alex and there is a way to discuss without hostility," ani Bela.
Paliwanag pa ni Bela, "Please dont misconstrue. There is no versus here. I love Alex, I am just covering areas she didnt cover with her tweet.
"Twitter is a public space and the chances that one might feel left out OR singled out are huge here.
"We don’t condemn or only accept one point in public spaces."
Kontra naman ng isang netizen, tila ini-invalidate raw ni Bela ang opinyon ni Alex.
"Exactly the point you have different opinions, but it seems your sounding like her opinion was wrong 'might misinform or sway opinions' as if your opinion was the right one," depensa ng netizen kay Alex.
Sabi naman ni Bela, "Then my tweet can possibly misinform and sway too, the point is to air two sides out everytime for a healthy discussion."
Sa huli, nag-iwan ng mensahe si Bela para kay Jzan:
"I hope you see the support and love available for you, not by people who you told your story to but chose to walk away & hurt you, but by people here who you don’t know but want the best for you anyway."