Doug Kramer and Chesca Garcia recently revealed their secret to a long-lasting marriage: a willingness to work hard and sacrifice for each other.
On October 9, 2022, the celebrity couple wrote about how their love continues to stand the test of time as they celebrate their 14th wedding anniversary and 19 years of being together.
NOT FOR THE SELFISH
In Chesca's Instagram post, she wrote (published as is), "Dearest @dougkramer,
"Did you know...
"One of the things I am most grateful about is the time we both give each other to talk. Those conversations make me feel validated, honored, and heard.
"Best of all, I also get to know you better and know what is in your heart. I love knowing you and I love growing with you."
Chesca underlined the positive impact of giving time to hear both sides out, without taking it as a chance to invalidate where the other person is coming from.
"I also feel most important when you listen to me without judgements. In turn, it makes it easy for me to take the back seat when it is your time to speak," she continued.
"I can listen with an accepting heart and not look at is an attack. I also know when I want to be heard I can always come to you.
"Your example benefits our marriage because I know it's never to tear us down but to build us up. Never to talk down but only to encourage and to speak life."
She also spoke about the deliberate choice to work on the relationship daily, and how a willingness to give is necessary for them to grow together.
"The value you put in our marriage makes me cherish us even more. I can focus on doing my role better because you're focused on your role too and how you can be a better half to me.
"It takes two to be successful in marriage. It takes two to choose each other. Marriage is constant work. Marriage is not for the selfish. Marriage is a lot of giving. It takes two very generous givers to make this work.
"When I think of how much we have grown in this relationship and the supernatural love it takes to make it work. I never account just the two of us in this equation, because honestly, human nature says otherwise.
"But God says it's possible! Just look to me, seek me, pray to me, put me first, AND DO IT TOGETHER! Only a supernatural God can do this!"
The mother of three thanked Doug once more for bringing her closer to God.
"I thank you for taking the lead for me to get to know Jesus! And because of that, with so much gratitude and love I credit God for all of his goodness---because beyond all our imperfections he has sustained us with his truth and commands.
"I love you my husband with all my heart! I only have respect and love for you! Our children are blessed to have a happy home because you love their mother well!"
DATING YOUR WIFE
For Team Kramer's patriarch, his Instagram post consisted of bullet points that offer tips to other couples on effective ways to make a relationship last as long as theirs.
Doug wrote (published as is), "So hard to imagine that we've been together for 19 yrs today! It all started Oct 9, 2003!
"Really enjoyed pranking you at 12 midnight with the empty ring box when I gave your gift. [emojo] Thanks Scarlett for capturing the photos!
"So to my best friend, sweetheart, confidant and partner in everything, Happy 14th wedding Anniversary! My love for you has continually grown throughout these years. [heart emoji]
"In addition, I decided to list down what has worked for @chekakramer and I, the past 19 yrs as a couple. It might work for you too! [emoji]
"- We started our very first conversation by talking for 7 hours straight! And up to day, our date nights still consist of spending time and talking for hours and hours! So undivided time together is essential. Date your wife!
"- We still laugh together so much! Even at each other's jokes, even if the kids find it so baduy."
Doug also revealed they have never let a conflict or misunderstanding last longer than a day.
His post continued, "- For 19 yrs, we still have not fought and made it last over [a] day. We always CHOOSE to fix our arguments after cooling down.
"- We respect each other's roles. I choose to focus on how I can cherish and love her. While she focuses on how she can respect and love me. Chesca's still my no.1 cheerleader!
"- We always try to look our best for each other. That's why we're still each other's "crush.
"- We have never talked down on each other during heated arguments. Speak life, not speak down.
"- We have never ever fought about money, not even when we were in debt and in need.
"- Lastly, we pray together and continually acknowledge we need Jesus because of how imperfect we are. His grace sustains us and makes us want to work on our marriage every single day.
"Cheers to us @chekakramer! [emoji] "I'm excited what the next years will bring. [heart emoji]"
The couple tied the knot on October 9, 2008, five years after they started their romantic relationship.
Together, they have three kids: Kendra, Scarlett, and Gavin.
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