In the hurly-burly world of showbiz, it's often said that finding enduring love can be as elusive as seeking lasting fame.
Tell that to Dimples Romana who just celebrated her 19th wedding anniversary with husband Boyet Ahmee on June 14, 2022.
In so many words, Dimples made a case for showbiz couples whose marriages have survived the test of time, starting with her own.
The Kapamilya actress said, "My husband and I, we’ve been together, if you were to add the two years that we’re together before we got married, it could’ve been 21 [years] already."
She added, "But yesterday, to be exact, we have been married for 19 years."
PEP.ph (Philippine Entertainment Portal) interviewed Dimples via Zoom last Wednesday, June 15, 2022, during her press launch as Generika drugstore's latest ambassador.
During the interview, Dimples also shared a few tips on how she and Boyet have maintained a healthy and strong relationship.
BE REALISTIC
The first on Dimple's set of advice for couples, married or not, was to have realistic expectations.
She said, "I’m sure marami sa inyo would know that my husband and I would never even look at our marriage as a perfect one and I think that’s the key.
"That you should never have unrealistic expectations of your spouses."
CHANGE FOR THE BETTER
Next, embrace change as Dimples put it sagely, "We are always bound to make mistakes... We are always bound to change as people,"
And by that, she meant to evolve for the better, not for worse, "It is encouraged, noh, na magbago tayo bilang mga tao.
"Kasi kapag sinasabi natin na, ‘Nagbago ka na!’ Iniisip ko talaga, paano kapag sinabi ko yun sa asawa ko na, ‘Nagbago ka na!’ ‘Aba’y natural!’
"Dahil if you’re looking at forever, when it comes to a marriage, dapat yung salitang ‘nagbago ka na’ will be looked upon as something that is positive.
"You are supposed to grow."
SIMPLE GESTURES MATTER
Dimples cited an example to show the huge impact of small gestures such as hugs, holding hands, and kisses in a relationship.
She said, "Ang gamot, nilalagnat ka ano, aba’y pag nilalagnat, konting yakap-yakap lang sa asawa mo, masaya na iyan siya.
She added, "O kunyare inuubo ka, aba bigyan ng tubig na marami.
"At kadalasan, ang mga asawa natin, inuubo lang iyan kapag may gusto i-add to cart, i-check out.
"Inuubo bigla. Parang nagkakasakit bigla yung mga asawa natin kapag may bibilhin e, di ba?
"E, siyempre, pag may sakit yung asawa mo, may gustong bilhin, ibigay mo na."
GIVE-AND-GIVE RELATIONSHIP
Surprisingly, Dimples disparaged give-and-take in a relationship.
Her defense, "Ako sa totoo, ang marriage would be not give-and-take, but to just give-and-give.
"If you were to look at it with taking, sometimes it becomes very selfish."
shutting up to keep peace
Dimples said she and her husband have a peace-keeping strategy that has worked for them to avoid blurting hurting words when they would get into arguments.
She related, "My husband would always tell me—funny, this is true though—every time he wants to tell me something that he feels I will not like, he drinks water.
"And he keeps that water inside his mouth until he forgets what he was about to say.
"May gusto siyang sabihin sa akin na hindi maganda, iinom siya ng tubig.
"At hahayaan niya lang yung tubig na yun, hindi niya lulunukin hangga’t hindi niya nalilimutan kung ano yung masama niyang sasabihin.
"E, di pagkatapos, bati na kami kasi hindi na niya nasabi yung hindi maganda niyang sasabihin. Hindi na ako na-hurt."
She later added, "I think, yun ang pinakagamot sa lahat, yung tubig. Para pag may sasabihin kang hindi maganda, inom ka na lang muna.
"Huwag mo na muna [inumin]. Mumugin mo, hayaan mo muna sa bibig mo hangga’t hindi mo masabi…
"Kasi minsan, ang pinag-uugatan talaga ng mga away ay ang mga salitang hindi magaganda."
PUTTING YOUR PARTNER FIRST
Dimples' sure-fire way to have her husband, and her marriage, for keeps: "I always make sure to put him first. He knows it."
She elaborated, "Sabi ko nga po dati, pag yung asawa ko, sinabi sa akin mag-quit ako sa trabaho, wala tayo magagawa diyan kasi masyado na tayo pinagbigyan, sa totoo lang.
"He’s been an amazing father to my children. And I cannot say that I’ve been a super hands-on parent to my children, e.
"Kasi lagi ako wala, nasa teleserye ako palagi. But I try my best naman to be with them especially during the times that they need mo most as a mom."
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