Rita Avila still coping with her son's death


Rita Avila lost her son last December 2 due to heart complication.


With all her strength, Rita Avila is still coping with the pain caused by her son's death.

It's been more than a week since Rita's baby Elia Jesu died of heart complication. Rita talked about her dilemma for the first time in an S-Files live interview yesterday, December 10.

Incidentally, her child could have been a month old yesterday. Rita gave birth to Elia Jesu last November 10.

Rita said, "Sa araw-araw, pilit naming inaaliw ang mga sarili namin. My husband [TV director Erick Reyes] and I end up crying. Nung may lumabas sa diaryo about the death of my son, maraming na-inspire. Napag-usapan namin ng asawa ko, ano ba ang ibig sabihin ng lahat ng ‘to?

"Sinasabi kasi nila that they admire my strength. Hindi ko alam if I'm really strong. They are all crying. Mga relatives, mga taong hindi namin kilala, nakikiiyak sila. Para silang naging magulang nung anak ko."

Rita recalled the events that lead to her son's immediate departure.

"Nung ipinanganak ko si Jesu, he was okay. After a week, yung normal na pedia checkup, narinig na may heart problem siya. After two days, ipina-ultrasound. Nakita may butas 'yung puso niya. He's a blue baby. Aside from the hole, apektado 'yung lungs niya kasi pinapasok ng tubig."

According to The Columbia Encyclopedia, Sixth Edition: A blue baby is an infant born with congenital heart defect that causes a blue discoloration of the skin as a result of cyanosis [deoxygenated blood].

Rita continued: "Dalawang beses akong pumupunta ng hospital para 'akapin siya. Pinaramdam ko sa kanya na nandun ako. Nagdesisyon na 'yung mga doctor na kelangang operahan na siya. In fact, dapat December 8 siya operahan. I was asking the doctors, 'Kaya pa ba ng bata kasi nahihirapan siyang huminga?'"

AMA NAMIN. "Nag-decide kami na iuwi muna sandali. It was the most difficult moment we had. Nire-ready na ako ng asawa ko na ‘kung ano man ang mangyari, ihanda mo sarili mo.' Ang dasal ko noon, ‘Lord, kung mahihirapan lang ‘yung anak namin, Ikaw na bahala. It's Your will.'

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"Paboritong kanta nung anak ko yung 'Ama Namin.' Habang ipinagbubuntis ko pa lang siya, araw-araw kinakantahan ko siya ng 'Ama Namin.' Pag narinig na nu'ng bata yung 'Ama Namin,' gumagalaw talaga siya sa tiyan ko. Hanggang sa ipinanganak ko siya, nung kinantahan ko siya sa nursery, na-recognize niya. Gumalaw-galaw yung mata. Yun na yung naging lullaby niya, nakakatulog siya. Pakiusap ko sa doctors, ‘Kantahin niyo.'"

GOD'S PLAN. The odds seem to be against Rita and her husband. Despite that, the actress never lost her faith in God.

"It's His will. I think from the beginning, divine yung plan. By the time na in-announce sa akin na buntis ako, naalala ko yung kuwento ng Panginoong Hesukristo... Yung the same way na in-announce kay Mama Mary na papangalanan mong Hesus [ang anak mo].

"Bago pa siya [Jesu] ipasok sa operating room, isinuko ko na sa Panginoon. ‘Sana buhayin Mo anak ko.' I never questioned why it happened. Pinaalala uli sa akin ng Diyos ang ginawang pagsuko ng Birheng Maria. Hindi ko ikinukumpara ang sarili ko kay Birheng Maria, pero these are small reminders.

"Nung nandoon siya sa ICU, parang yung Panginoon, nakadipa, may tusok sa mga kamay, sa paa, tapos kung saan din hiniwa ang Panginoon. Hindi ko rin ikinukumpara ang anak ko sa Panginoon. Hinahanapan namin ng ibig sabihin ang lahat ng ito."

ACCEPTANCE. Crying a bit, Rita said: "Maaaring hindi kami suwerte as parents. [Baka] may iba pang assignments na gusto ang Diyos. Ang bawat tao, may kanya-kanyang pain na pinagdadaanan. Depende sa atin kung paano natin tatanggapin yun, kung ano yung mga dapat nating matutunan. Sa sarili ko ngayon, gusto ko lang marinig nung iba pang in pain na puwedeng tanggapin. There will be better times, there will be worst times.

"Ang tao may kanya-kanya pace of healing to the time. Just respect your feelings. Andyan pa yung asawa natin, mga kaibigan, mga relatives na pagdating ng araw, kailangan ng lakas natin."

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Although her doctors advised her to try to have another baby since she is still physiologically capable, Rita said she and her husband are not yet ready.


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