StarStruck Season 2 Ultimate Female Survivor Ryza Cenon admitted to having suicidal tendency when she experienced depression last year.
The 27-year-old Kapuso actress said that her depression was caused by mounting problems at the time.
“Almost one year din kasi akong walang work.
“Mag-isa lang din ako na binubuhay yung sarili ko.
“Sobrang na-depress ako. May time na iniisip ko talagang mag-suicide.”
PEP.ph (Philippine Entertainment Portal) and a few other reporters were able to interview Ryza at her first art exhibit, Independencia: Ang Panimula, held at Chef Laudico Gueverra’s Restaurant, San Juan City, Thursday, June 9.
SUICIDE ATTEMPTS. While she never really got hospitalized to due a suicide attempt, Ryza related that there were times when she would hurt herself because of her overwhelming depression.
“May times na sinasaktan ko yung sarili ko, pero hindi yung sinusugatan talaga.
“Like, kung anong mahawakan ko. Before pa [nangyari], may dumbbell tapos ipupukpok ko sa ulo ko.
“May times din [yung] ballpen ginaganun…”
Pope Francis’s visit in the Philippines last year proved to be a turning point for Ryza.
She realized that she had to get her act together and find an outlet to her negative thoughts.
“May [suicide] attempt lang ako, pero hindi ko siya kaya gawin.
“Takot pa rin ako kay God kasi alam kong mali siya.”
OVERCOMING HER DEPRESSION. With the help of a fan, Ryza took up painting as a therapeutic tool to release her depression over her lack of TV projects and failed romantic relationship.
“Actually sabay-sabay kasi siya [cause of depression] kaya iba-iba yung emotion na na-feel ko.
“Sa second batch [of paintings], sobrang negative niya talaga. Ang mga title Delusion...
“Isa lang ang positive—yung Endless Joy.”
Painting proved to be an effective therapy for Ryza who admittedly has a hard time seeking help from experts or even her friends.
“Hindi talaga ako palakuwento. Ayoko ng mga party. Hindi ako social na tao.
“Hangga't kaya kong itago at kaya ko i-solve nang ako lang, isu-solve ko nang hindi ko sinasabi [sa iba] dahil ayokong pabigat.”
Among her few friends from showbiz, only Chynna Ortaleza knew about her depression.
“Kasi magkaano kami ng personality. Siya yung mas nakakaintindi sa akin.
”Nagsi-share din siya ng mga ganun din niyang moment.
“Sinasabi niya, ‘Kaya mo ‘yan. Challenge lang ‘yan. Pinapa-strong ka lang ni God.’”