Heart Evangelista rises above depression, insecurity after miscarriage

IMAGE Noel Orsal

Heart Evangelista on overcoming pain of her miscarriage: "The things you go through needs to build your character... I realized na, at the end of the day, plano pa rin ni Lord ang matutuloy."


Inamin ni Heart Evangelista na doble ang sakit na naramdaman niya nang mawala ang ipinagbubuntis niyang twins nitong mid-2018.   

Sa gitna ng kanyang pagdadalamhati ay nakadagdag pa sa depresyon niya ang masasakit na salita ng mga taong gusto siyang hilain pababa. 

Saad ng Kapuso actress-host, "Being in showbiz didn’t make it easy for me.

"I didn’t even realize that that was even a factor of my depression. But it was.

"Because for the first time in my life, after a really long time, every single word that was said against my baby and against me really hit me. It really did.

"My heart was bleeding every time they said something bad, and it was really hurtful." 

Umabot daw sa puntong kinuwestiyon ni Heart ang kanyang self-worth. 

"Parang nung time na yun, I felt that I really was, kumbaga in Tagalog, parang wala akong kuwentang tao."

Pero giit ni Heart, hindi niya hinayaang tuluyang madala ng anumang sasabihin ng iba.

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Aniya, "But I became stronger. And I feel like I can face anything else. I take pride on that." 

Nakapanayam ng PEP.ph (Philippine Entertainment Portal) at piling entertainment press si Heart pagkatapos ng kanyang contract signing sa GMA Artist Center kahapon, December 13.

SUPPORT FROM CHIZ

Malaking bagay para kay Heart ang pagmamahal at suporta ng kanyang mister na si Senator Francis "Chiz" Escudero.

"He was very, very strong. Actually the whole time, dalawang beses ko lang siyang nakitaan ng sadness.

"One was when sinabi ko na walang heartbeat [yung baby], nabitawan niya yung phone niya.

"So, dun medyo naawa ako. For him to show a little bit [of weakness], that means he's very bothered." 

Naramdaman daw ni Heart na sinikap ni Chiz na maging malakas para sa kanya.

"And then the other one, he thought I was sleeping. Pagbaba ko, umiinom siya ng beer sa sala. Pulang-pula yung mata niya.

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"So siguro, umiiyak siya nung time na yun. Dalawang beses lang yun."

Dagdag ni Heart, "Isa siya sa mga strong pillars ko. He really did keep me sane in any way.

"He encouraged me to get out of the house. He pushed me to go back to work." 

LESSONS FROM HER LOSS

May 12, 2018 nang inanunsiyo ni Heart ang kanyang pagbubuntis. 

Pagkalipas ng limang araw, ibinalita ng Kapuso actress na twins ang kanyang ipinagbubuntis, pero hindi nabuhay ang isa dahil hindi nag-develop ang embryo na iyon. 

Pagpatak ng Hunyo, kung kailan tatlong buwan na sana siyang nagdadalantao, nalaman ni Heart na huminto ang pagtibok ng puso ng isa pa niyang still-unborn baby. 

Bagamat nalugmok siya sa kalungkutan, ibinahagi ni Heart na kinalaunan ay mas pinagtibay nito ang kanyang pagkatao. 

"'Cause I guess, you know, when you really go through something, you can't have it all. The things you go through needs to build your character.

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"I do work very, very hard. When I put something on my list, I'm kinda used to getting what I aim for.

"And I really didn’t expect that [loss of my twins]."

Pinakamahalagang aral daw na natutunan ni Heart ay ang tanggapin kung anuman ang kalooban ng Diyos. 

Patuloy ni Heart, "I feel naman na grabe yung ibinalik sa akin ni Lord.

"Nagkaroon tuloy ako ng dalawang angel that'll say, 'Hey, you know, this will make her very happy. So, let's give her this...' 

"So I don't really question." 

Ipinagkakatiwala na rin daw niya sa Diyos kung kailan sila magkakaroon ng baby ni Chiz. 

"It'll happen when it happens. I don’t wanna super plan my life anymore. 

"I mean, I have my goals, more or less my timetable.

"But with what happened to me, I realized na, at the end of the day, plano pa rin ni Lord ang matutuloy." 

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Bukod sa mga pagkakaabalahan niyang bagong proyekto sa GMA-7, abala rin si Heart sa iba't iba niyang negosyo. 

Katatapos lang niyang maglunsad ng sariling clothing line sa isang sikat na fashion brand at mayroon na rin siyang sariling eye makeup brand. 

Bukod dito ay nakatakdang ilunsad ni Heart ang dinisenyo niyang dinnerware, clutch bag, at iba pa niyang passion projects. 


ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Follow Rachelle Siazon on Twitter: @pinkshi


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